Tuesday, December 31, 2013

He Said ‘Hello’ and my Heart was Gone (Written on 08 Oct 2013)

It was a warm Tuesday Morning
Bag in hand I walked quietly and solemnly to school
Half way there I met a guy. He said ‘Hello’ with a smile
I kind of smiled back and tried to walk away,
But No! Mr. Man had a few other words to say
I tarried but for some seconds. Wasn’t really listening
But strangely enough I still remember every word he said
He said hello but my heart wasn’t gone

Two weeks had gone by and I wasn’t thinking of it anymore
Yet another Tuesday morning, yet another solemn walk to school
And again another ‘Hello’ this time with a little joke. I laughed
The last guy was a jerk, took my smiles and my laughter away
But he brought a smile and then a laugh back to my face
Back home, I told my bff someone said ‘Hello’
But I forgot to say it had me flustered for a bit
He said hello but my heart wasn’t gone yet

A week and a half had gone by. I was still thinking about his ‘Hello’
This time it was a walk way up the street for a breath of fresh air
Semester break was finally around, Xmas was calling
And there, the ‘Hello’ which caused turmoil in my fairytale heart
He said he was about to call. I laughed it off the classic lie of a player
Not sure he quite got my number but strangely he did
He promised to visit the following day. I laughed harder. He didn’t know my place
He said hello but my heart wasn’t quite gone yet

I woke up in the morning cleaned up as usual and cooked
By midday I was reading a Fitzgerald Classic “The Great Gatsby”
Then there was a light knock at my door. I said “come in”
There he was. He said “Hello” my heart skipped for a bit
I thought for a second ‘how did he know my place’
But that was irrelevant now. I was happy he had come after all
He came in with a thousand more jokes and lots of charm
He said hello and my heart was leaving its homestead

Two weeks apart, family reunions, festivities, lots of food and drink
But the only feast I wanted was him. Only party I needed was him
Back to school and first day there he was at my doorstep
A charming smile on his face, a gift in hand and an “I missed you”
I let him walk through the doors of my home, my life, and my heart
I opened my gift, behold they were roses. Now I was floating on thin air
I could never forget a gift like that. I cherished it for years after that
He had said hello and my heart was so gone

Many years have gone by. Lots of water under the bridge has traversed
We parted ways many years ago. In a way only we two could
He has said “Hello” to others. Don’t know if they were the same
Others have said “Hello” to me. But they were never the same
I’ve fancied myself in love with another. I’ve fancied myself moving on
I’ve even fancied myself staying unmarried forever or married to another
I’ve been happy. I’ve been sad. I’ve fallen in and out of love with him more times than I can count

When he said hello, he took my heart away. Will I ever get my heart back?

By  Ngwe-Nwi Claudette

Thursday, December 5, 2013

Love On The Rebound

I fell in Love on the rebound or at least I thought it was a rebound.

I told myself I was not ready to love another, not just yet,
I told myself I just needed someone to make me smile,
I told myself I just needed someone to help me forget the pain of a lost love,
I told myself I was in control of my heart and not the other way round,
And was I convinced I was in control, until long after the breakup. 

The first days were cool. I was strong. Had been through worst things,
The weeks which followed were slightly gloomy but I was strong, won’t cry,
The months which followed the weeks were becoming somber, sad and solitary,
The years which followed the months were most dark, tears came now and then,
My heart only broke months and years after the Break-Up.

I only knew it was love when it was out the door,
I only knew it was love when there was no turning back,
I only knew it was love when the locks on the doors had changed,
I only knew it was love when my heart broke in the middle of the night for loosing the one I had called "my Rebound,"
I only knew it was love when the tears of my broken heart soaked my pillow, so much so that I could not be consoled.

Now I’m at the crossroads of my life, wondering which way to go,
Should I tell you how I feel? Or Should I just Move on as I have so far?
Should I find another love? Or Seek out that which seems to elude me?
Will it be easy to get you back on since I have figured out you are the one?
Or should I just admit the fact that I lost the moon while counting the stars?

I just can’t believe my "Rebound Love" was actually one of my big Loves!!!

Written by Ngwe-Nwi Claudette
(October 2013)